Are you stuck?

Jun 18, 2023

An elderly gentleman I knew was recently admitted to a skilled nursing facility, as his body was so ravaged by a chronic disease that he was no longer able to care for himself. His mind was still intact, but his body had not kept the pace.

In the man’s room were decorations, hung by loving family members, that illustrated a life of fulfillment and love, but also sadness and dark times. One particular thing caught my attention: a shadow box displaying military service mementos. Numerous awards and achievements were displayed, but the Purple Heart and Bronze Star especially drew my eye. I asked about his time in the military, and he shared the understandably strong emotions and vivid memories from his time in the service.

I asked about the two aforementioned awards, and his face darkened.

“That was a bad day,” he recalled. Several soldiers were in a tight spot, and if someone had not helped, they certainly would have perished. He commented that he felt he needed to do something. In that moment, standing on the sidelines was not an option. Although it was tempting to be paralyzed by fear, to be stuck in the moment—he moved.

This conversation has made me reflect on my own life, and how I have at times felt stuck, or compelled to move. Certainly, the feeling of being stuck is universal—we can feel stuck in our jobs, our relationships, even our hometown. We can feel stuck in our emotions: fear, sadness, apprehension, loneliness. We can even feel spiritually stuck, unable to connect with God or move our faith forward.

What do you do to “unstick” yourself? Sometimes you may be able to grab your own XtraTuffs and pull them from the mud, but at other times a helping hand is needed to keep trekking along.

Some people seem to be perpetually stuck. I have one such acquaintance who repeatedly tells his spouse, “After [insert any future event] happens, then things will be easier!” But in reality, either the event failed to occur or new obstacles and challenges to happiness arrived just on the event’s heels.

On the flip side, some people seem to be perpetually in motion, always available to help wherever and whenever they can. We all have had the privilege of encountering that one person that brings out the best in those around them. After being with them, we instinctively want to do better and be the better version of ourselves. In my case, it was Grandpa Steve. He had the unique ability to peer into my heart and mind, allowing me to just naturally open up and talk honestly and openly with him. Grandpa Steve wasn’t stuck—he jumped into difficult situations to save souls from ennui and spiritual peril.

Christ was also one such hero. The Spirit he had with him allowed people to grow and flourish and share their hearts with others. Galatians 5:22-23 reads “But the fruit of the Spirit is love, joy, peace, longsuffering, gentleness, goodness, faith, meekness, temperance: against such there is no law” (KJV). These fruits of the spirit flowed from the Savior in abundance, and if we take a moment to ponder, we see many of these traits in those who build us up.

Like the popular “love languages,” I’ve started to recognize that we have our own “unstuck” language: a particular favorite flavor of spiritual fruit that our hearts delight in and that helps us overcome our challenges. When we identify which fruit of the spirit helps us break the cycle of being stuck, we can spend time with people who freely share that gift and can help us get moving.

I am not naive to think that this happens overnight, but perhaps much like how water can gradually erode away an earthen dam or shoreline, the inertia of inaction will be broken down by these spiritual gifts working on us. It is my hope and prayer that these small and spiritual gifts might impact us and propel us for good.

John Boston is a local physician, father, husband, grandfather, believer in Christ and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints.

Originally published on frontiersman.com, part of the BLOX Digital Content Exchange.